why family meals need to be on your

Why family meals need to be on your plate

I grew up with family meals as did my husband. But we both recall

times when it was kids and mom and dad was added later; or when the

big family time was reserved for weekends - although that often

involved grandparents. But, it seems lately that many families reserve

holidays for those sorts of meals, such as the upcoming Thanksgiving

holiday.

In 2005, Miriam Weinstein wrote a book called The Surprising Power of

Family Meals. I have to admit time has not allowed me to read it cover

to cover yet but that does not lesson the impact of having it sit on

my shelf next to the "Ready, Set, Relax" folder. Ready, Set, Relax is

a cool idea spawned by some New Jersey families tired of all the

hustle and bustle of modern family life. Each year since 2002

Ridgewood, N.J., this community has taken a time out together. I loved

this concept so much I floated the idea by folks in my town including

the PTO but was told everyone was too busy for a day off. I found that

amusing and sad at the same time and a telling sign of our times.

For each of us, the question to ask is this: can we actually have a

family moment at the table sometime during the day, or at least a few

times a week? You bet! The key to success is not defining ourselves by

Normal Rockwell standards. Most of the families I know, including my

own, have such odd schedules that they are all thankful if they are

home at the same time at some point during the day while everyone is

awake.

There are many ways to have a family meal during the school and work

week. You can have a family breakfast. For families with small kids or

who have a parent who comes home late, have everyone eat dinner

together who is home but then site again when the other parent

returns. We often eat our dessert at the table when my husband has his

dinner. As for a true family meal, reality may dictate that we all do

this on weekends but make sure it gets done. Lately we've been having

a consistent family meal on Friday nights where we all come together

and cook. We keep TV and computers off, refuse to answer the phone and

actually set the table with candles. It has become a fun way to end

the week and a great way to reconnect.

Weinstein agrees. As noted in the Washington Post, she notes:

"Although I have spent this book ranting about supper, you may have

noticed that, underneath it all, supper is not really the point.

Supper is only the occasion, the excuse. The subject is actually

family -- establishing, enjoying, and maintaining ties. The goal is

creating and reinforcing a secure place for your loved ones in a

society that can seem awfully uninterested in human needs."

And, she has research on her side that demonstrates that in families

who eat together there are less teens with eating disorders and drug

and alcohol abuse. Here are some interesting links for more

information and opinions:

Benefits of family meals from project EAT

Family meals help prevent eating disorders

Making family meals happen

So, as 2007 winds down and 2008 approaches, look at your family life

and try to niche out weekly, if not daily, family food times. It is a

habit worth forming and one none of you will want to break once it

kicks in!

I must go now - I have a table to set and ingredients to buy. Bon

Appetite!